Review: Lonesome’s Pizza (Old Town/Delivery)


Lonesome’s Pizza (Old Town/Delivery/Take-Out)
350 West Burnside (at Dante’s)
Portland, OR 97209
Map It!
Delivery Area Map
Ph: Eastside 503-234-0114/Westside 503-274-9570
Hours: Su-Wed 11 a.m. to 3 a.m.; Th-Sat 11 a.m. to 4 a.m.
Website | Menu | Twitter | Facebook
Lunch Money: $$$
Rating: ★★★★½

Whenever I’m having a particularly bad day, and I can’t even fathom the thought of eating on my nervous/upset stomach, who do I call? Well, I should probably call my therapist, but that’d be a $150 bill, so I call Lonesome’s Pizza instead.

Ok, ok…it’s not just bad days that have me ringing up Lonesome’s. They’re my go-to mini pizza party for celebrating a Here Comes Honey Boo Boo marathon or satisfying that insatiable, emotional PMS craving or finding an unexpected $20 in the dryer or, really, any reason works for me.

You might be thinking: ‘I’ve never heard of Lonesome’s Pizza…how can it be any better than the hundreds of other ‘za joints in this town?’

How? They just are.

There is one slight issue. Lonesome’s is take-out or delivery only and the delivery area is limited, so be sure to check HERE to make sure you’re in their delivery zone. If not, you might have to start making plans to move. (I’m only in by about a block, and I’m forever grateful for that.)

Lucky for everyone who lives and/or works in the Lonesome’s delivery area, they are NOW open for lunch. This is the best news ever! [Note: In my personal opinion.]

Not only do they dish out probably the most unique pies with the craziest names around, but they also serve up art and music. Every pizza box introduces you to an artist or musician, and the large pizza boxes include a complimentary CD. Broaden your artistic horizons while you chow down—Pizza Hut and Dominos certainly don’t offer that!

OK, now on to the food. There’s a reason I would order from Lonesome’s every night if my wallet and waistline allowed it—the pizza is damn good!

Personally, I’m addicted to the John Stamos vs. the entire Comanche nation (yes, I warned you about the names)…or more simply: the #11. It’s an Alfredo base topped with mozzarella, bacon, artichokes and parsley. I typically add prosciutto as well. To. Die. For. (Or to die from. The menu states it’s “a happy heart attack.”)

Other household faves include:

#14: Lando Calrissian vs. that tank from Tiananmen Square, which is the Alfredo base topped with mozzarella, chicken and broccoli.

#5: Hasselhoff vs. Velcro headboard restraints, which is a white pie with ricotta, mozzarella, walnuts, bacon, rosemary and potato slices.

#13: Tesla the inventor vs. Dokken the band, which is a Lonesome’s original consisting of Ethiopian spiced red sauce, braised lamb and goat cheese.

[Another Note: I’m currently drooling as I write these descriptions.]

Prices for the 17” specialty pizzas are currently $19 to $24, and they are HUGE! Smaller versions of the pies (10”) are $9 each (and the perfect size for lunch). You can also custom build your own pizza, with toppings including “unicorn balls”—I’m not sure if that’s considered a meat or a veggie topping.

As if pizza weren’t enough, Lonesome’s offers up some hefty sides as well. And by hefty, I mean holy-shit huge! The “wings” are actually chicken drumsticks doused in your sauce of choice. The breadsticks are equally indulgent. You can also order salads and sandwiches.

And, because this is Portland, there are plenty of veggie, vegan and G-Free options.

Overall, I love Lonesome’s Pizza. It’s just soooooo good. If you’re lucky enough to live in the delivery area (or willing to pick up take-out), give it a try. You can thank me later.

PROS:
NOW open for lunch!!!!
Excellent pizza
Unique Portland business
Great art and music offerings with each pizza
Massive drumstick “wings”

CONS:
Limited delivery area
I’d get really fat if I ordered from them every day

Lonesome's Pizza on Urbanspoon

NEW Stumptown Lunch Contest!

OK, you know we love Five Guys Burgers and Fries, right? Did you know that all across the country Five Guys uses some of the quotes from our review on their in-store marketing displays? Mind you, we’re not in all of their restaurants, but we are in a lot of them. Like here. Here (in a ShayTards video!). Here. And here. So cool!

Here’s your mission: Find one of our signs in a Five Guys, take a picture of yourself and the sign, then tweet it (@stumptownlunch) or email it (sarah@stumptownlunch.com) to us. Easy, right?!

The first person to do so will win a $20 Five Guys gift card, a $10 iTunes gift card and a few other nifty Stumptown-centric items!

Just DO IT…we know you want to!

Good luck!

Hint: This is what you’re looking for….

Five Guys love from a ShayTards video….

pocatello-fiveguys

Who knew we were up in Idaho Five Guys restaurants?? Well, I didn’t until I saw this on a rather old ShayTards video.

You can fast forward to 12:16 to see their visit to the Pocatello Five Guys!

Stumptown Lunch News: Goodbye Chili’s

On Friday, a friend and I decided to make a dent in his Chili’s gift card (a recent birthday present, and one of his favorite places to eat). We drove over to the Lake Oswego location to grab a quick bite only to find an empty parking lot.Chili’s was closed. Seal up and completely erased of any Chili’s identifying markers.

What? Just a few weeks ago the Internet was packed with ads touting their new Bottomless Express Lunch.

I had heard that Chili’s was in financial trouble, but didn’t realize that they boarded up four Portland locations almost a month ago. So if you have a Chili’s gift card you’re going to have to head over to Clackamas Town Center–the only Chili’s still open in the entire Portland area.

Stumptown Lunch News: Finding Finder

finder.gif

The Lunch Lady enjoyed the sunny Wednesday evening at Willamette Week’s Finder launch party at the Lizard Lounge. The party was packed, the food from Salvador Molly’s was delicious (best pulled pork sliders ever!) and the free Widmer brews hit the spot.

Finder is an excellent guide to all things Portland. We especially love all the cool photos and the price: it’s FREE!

Finder is not only a great restaurant reference, but also cover shopping, nightlife, entertainment, the arts and provides in-depth reviews of the neighborhoods that make up our fine city.

Get one before they’re all gone! Here‘s where you can get your very own copy of Finder.

Cheers,

The Lunch Lady

[Editor’s note: We stopped by the Tualatin Public Library to pick up an extra copy today, but they didn’t have any copies yet. The librarian also mentioned that the library closes tomorrow for a month as they are moving to a new location.]